Outside Reading: Reflective Essay

March 21 http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/dreamjobs/dreamjobs6.html
Scott C. Reynolds, "So You Wanted to be a Professional Snowboarder..."

Scott Reynolds has written a series of "Dream Jobs" that children often wish they could have, but then he manages to show the negative sides of all of them.  In this particular essay, he writes about the reader, in second person, as a snowboarder with what seems to be a great future who has an unfortunate accident and ends up working in a ski shop.  Eventually, overcome with jealousy for those who can still snowboard, the reader turns into an evil worker who manages to booby trap everything sold.
There is not one specific tone to this essay as it is written like a biography, but it is a slightly sarcastic piece.  When he writes that you are setting snowboarders up for disaster and, "on a good day, injury..." this tone is displayed especially well.
The diction is used to help create this tone.  It is very upfront and honest, and does not hide anything.  It shows everything from the dreams of an eight-year old with a "spirit" to succeed to an older student who is "hooked" upon the sport, all the way to an almost professional athelete with an "epic" face plant and an "abrupt end" to the career.
There is very little punctuation used in this article other than periods - no question marks or exclamation points, the whole essay is very upfront and laid out very simply.  This makes the whole piece seem to be very realistic and almost like it has happened.
Reynolds also uses imagery as one of his main techniques.  He describes the hills and the injury very harshly.  He talks about the feeling of the "ligaments" shredding and the "ungroomed side of the mountain" that the subject (the reader) goes to and cries about the terrible end to his/her career.
Overall, this is a very well written article.  I did not find very much that could be improved, but it would definately not make an appropriate AP essay.  As the tone is sarcastic and the diction is not very mature or of a very high level, it would probably not get a high grade.  The main reason that this essay would not work for an AP essay, though, is because it is written in second person.  This makes the article interesting, but it is not appropriate for AP.